However, this past week end, I found myself caught up in an argument around the question if I would say yes or no to a guy that sounds great for me etc besides for this one trait. (for example, he wants to make alyah, he doesn't want me to have a doctorate...). About alyah and logistics, read my previous post and about my education, he's be a little too late for that. But anyways, my belief is that many things that you think matter can become less of a priority once you know a person.
In fact, I believe that if you meet a guy casually, without being set up and checked out previously, he may not correspond to what you're looking for and depending on how the situation presents itself, you may or may not fall for him. It can be a good thing as much as it could be a dangerous thing. I can't do without a feel of one's personality and other than big obvious trait like Shomer Shabbat and Kashrut, there is a lot I do not need to define.
My theory was proven true last night. I had a first date with a guy I might never see again. But regardless, I got to go out with a person who is drastically different from my lifestyle, my views and everything I thought I would need, want, like best in a guy. It all went out the window. No I am not in love but I had a good time with him. Hypothetically speaking (not sure about further dates) I could see myself learning to connect with him. It would be a new experience.
It just goes to show, yes you've heard from many that you end up with the person you never thought you'd marry. It really goes beyond that, beyond the fact that anyways when you get married, you cannot control all that you had wisely planned and thoroughly checked out.
So why do you hang on to such "important" criteria?