Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Matchmaker Matchmaker, Make Me a Match

Find me a find
      Catch me a catch...

As of today, my mother has officially married off 19 couples (none of which include her children).

My 18 years old sister has one married couple to her count.

My 25 years old sister is considered a cripple for still being single.

I am single and happy. I've seen it too often to agree to throw myself into the cruel arena of dating. If I get set up, great. If i meet someone, even better. But I am nowhere near the days when I will be going around distributing a resume (still non-existent).

My mother is amazing. She stays out of my dating life, she gives me the space I need in order to make my own decisions. When I told her I might start dating, just so she shouldn't be shocked if a guy in my life ever came up she said to me :"You know I can help you, if you want."

She made me smile.

19 is a big number.
 Maybe she can help my older sister first.


  1. What about me? ;)

  2. If you're not in the "Shadchan only" crowd, then finding your bashert is like going to sleep. You can't force it, it just happens when you're ready.

  3. Anon: Even if you are in the "shadchan only" crowd, it is the same way. Those who go way back with the shidduch system didn't run after shadchanim; one day someone would call. Running after shadchanim never got me anywhere than a wasted evening or insults. One day, someone approaches you . . . regarding a guy.

  4. Wow! That is a big number! Congrats to your mother, and maybe in that Zechus you and your sister(s?) will find yours happily and easily!

  5. @anon: I agree with princess Lea, even through Shadchan, you can't force it. and if it does happen when you're not ready than shame

    @kindred: Thank you :)

  6. 19...wow! How do I get a name on her list? :)

  7. Do you have any statistical data?

    Like how many couples she's set up, and what percentage of them have gotten married?

    19 does sound like a lot, but (spoiler alert: cynicism and number crunching to follow) given the choice, I would take someone with a high percentage of matches over a high number.

    Someone who has only set up, say, 7 couples, and 4 of them got married (over 50%) has a much better rate (I.e. Better quality matching) than someone who set up 93 couples and has had 17 of them get married (about 20%). I'm a huge fan of quality over quantity, but I tend to be very discerning in that sense. perhaps overly-so.

    In reality, chances are it's not so simple anyways.

  8. @Ish yehudi:
    I found your comment a little offensive. My mother is NOT a shadchan. She just happens to be an amazing woman with the patience to hear people out and then truly help them out. I do not know how many people she has set up and I do not care to know. Ur argument is irrelevant considering that she sets up people either when they seek her help, or when she comes up with a great idea. She does not do it as a living, she works full time.
    I wish you the Zchus of 19 married couples to your name, if only....

  9. Clearly you are very proud of your mother and it sounds like she is a wonderful, sensitive and caring woman.

    None of what I said was intended as a shot at your mother, nor did I intend to devalue the people she has brought together. If it seemed that way, I sincerely apologize and I want you to know that was never my intent.